The Monster in me

There’s a monster in me.
It’s in the back of my mind,
but I know it’s there, although it hides.
Most of my days, I’m totally unaware,
but on this particular day, I know that it’s there.

It’s that itch that needs scratching,
the song that I can’t sing,
the mile that I can’t run,
all the things that I can’t do and the things that I haven’t done,
that makes me feel that life’s passing me by.
I don’t know quite how, I don’t know quite why.

It’s that hollow feeling in my heart,
that I’m not playing a significant part,
that bothers me.
I’m damn well for real, that I know;
I’m made from flesh and blood,
I have a heart and soul.
But I want to put all my talents and abilities on overdrive,
and drive them till there’s no more left,
and none of them can hide.

Something is teasing me, I don’t know what it is.
It’s in the morning, then again, it’s there at night.
Sometimes it may seem funny but most times, gives me fright.
It’s something that is telling me that I could be something more,
and that I should journey forward and not close any door
to those things that draw me to places and people where I wouldn’t go.
Places and people like you, that would open up my mind and soul.

But there’s something about me that I don’t like today.'
It’s tearing at my soul, it’s gnawing at my breast.
I think it’s another defining moment of my life.
I think it’s just another test.

Again, it’s telling me that I need to go further with my life,
that I need to know what I know,
that my journey has not yet been concluded,
that there are still miles yet for me to go.
I must journey straight ahead,
I must confront the monster, take it down,
and put my unrest to bed.

Because there is a monster in me.
It’s in the back of my mind,
I know it’s there, until it hides.
Most of my days I’m totally unaware,
but on this particular day, I know that it’s there.
But it won’t be there for long,
I will push the envelope one more time again,
by year’s end, it’ll be gone.
Oh yes, it will be gone.